Tuesday, August 02, 2005
figured out that i prolly din update for quite long. cus pple are bugging me to update. have a sudden loads of feelings lately. sometimes, i realise that we grow up after feeling disappointed, upset. yet, it is not easy to grow up, because it's painful you know. cus they are all the things we don't like.
you know what. it hurts me to touch the piano now. all the memories return. cus hes so much lke ern. being wth him, it's really love and hate.. cus you enjoy it yet it's so painful.to you: i am sorry. but i really cannot do it. haha and maybe time passing a bit fast lately. i din't touch the piano for two weeks already. wow, that's considered quite long for me.
looking forward to cadet recognisation day this sat. get to see all my ulp mates!! and because of this. i shall apologise to my yearmates (: hai, i know i always abandon you all for my groupmates. i am sorry. hmm. really sorry. but i just love my group so much! anyways. decided to join vip i.e. hq. yay. guess i really really love redcross. but i am definitely not coming back to rgs! haha. hve some schs in mind to join. but shant say here.
haha. the orphanage finally got thru. what am i doing mans. i don't even know why i am doing the things i do lately. ms ang asking me to stop all my work. yet the work is piling up day by day. what am i doing?! i figured out my life is a mess you know. a real mess. be it school, cca, other commitments, piano, relationships, family. everything. i am telling you. think i am not clear-minded now. all the mess is making me.. sigh. cus everything is a mess. everyone is giving pressure, be it loads or little. and i feel pressured. i feel like shutting down. i feel like going under my dear umbrella.
fell in love at21:49
